I think I'm lost

I walk in every class and debate if I came in the right class. I mean, I'm fine with the reading, but discussion and human interaction is just not my thing.
Anyway, I want to talk and reflect on two stories today; maybe extend my blog more than I have up to this point. Hills Like White Elephants & Where Are You Going, Where have you been. 
I believe this this picture describes it perfectly; how I've felt in the class and how I've felt with these stories. Hollow, alone, and left in question. The 2 stories we read over for homework actually turned into my new favorites, from the ones we've read this year up to now. These last two stories are like we just fell into a mud pit and left there to either sink or swim. I think Mullins is right, ha. I think he was right that maybe we should reread some of the stories again and again. Maybe we'll find something new we didn't catch the first time. I mean, that's how I am with movies. I love to watch them over and over again because I just love watching them in details, finding something I didn't catch the first time; almost like being a spy. In Hills Like White Elephants, I'll admit, I didn't catch that they were talking about an abortion  even though once I knew that was the topic- it makes everything soo obvious. Maybe if I read it again I would've caught that, and that's what I'll start doing. Re-reading and training my mind to spot the signs that are sticking out, or any red flags. Now on, Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been, I was talking to Mrs. Fisher and she gave me this idea that, maybe the girl was dreaming everything & then I think, maybe she was right. I mean I thought that the main character could be day dreaming, but never an actual dream. It opened my eyes to a new perspective, that this teenager was stuck in between two worlds; child life and adult life. I think she was trying to grow up too fast and when in her dream the guy came to get her and her family was away, I think it came to her that, she's just not ready to be out on her own just quite yet. Another thing that surprised me is that I found out when the guy was "stabbing her over and over again," I thought the author literally meant stabbed because she tried to pick up the phone & call for help, turns out he raped her. I need to pay more attention to detail like this otherwise I'll get nowhere in the class, or in life.